Common legal problems

Choosing a divorce or family law lawyer

What family lawyers do, ways to resolve a divorce without a trial, how they charge, and what to prepare before your first meeting. 4 min read

Family law covers divorce and legal separation, child custody and parenting time, child and spousal support, property division, adoption, paternity, and protective orders. These cases are emotional and often long, so it is worth choosing a lawyer carefully.

If you are in danger

If you or your children are in immediate danger, call 911. Courts can issue protective orders quickly, often the same day, and many courthouses have advocates who help with the paperwork. The National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799-7233.

Ways to resolve a family case

Negotiation between lawyers, leading to a written settlement the court approves.
Mediation, where a neutral mediator helps both sides reach agreement. Many courts require mediation in custody disputes.
Collaborative divorce, where both sides and their lawyers agree to work it out without going to court.
Litigation, where a judge decides the issues the parties can't agree on.

Ask each lawyer how often their cases settle and how they approach settlement. A lawyer who is comfortable in court but also good at negotiating is often the best fit.

How family lawyers charge

Most charge by the hour and ask for an advance deposit. Some offer flat fees for uncontested divorces or specific tasks. Contingency fees are generally not allowed for obtaining a divorce or a particular amount of support or property. In some cases a court can order one spouse to contribute to the other's fees. See how lawyers charge.

What to gather before you meet

A list of assets and debts: bank and retirement accounts, real estate, vehicles, loans and credit cards.
Recent tax returns and pay stubs for both spouses, if you have them.
Any prenuptial agreement, existing court orders, or papers you have been served with.
Your children's schedule and any concerns about their safety or wellbeing.

Questions to ask

How much of your practice is family law, and in which county courts?
What would you expect to happen in a case like mine, and how long might it take?
What can I do now to protect my children and my finances?
What will this likely cost, and what drives the cost up?

Family law depends heavily on state law and local court practice, so choose a lawyer licensed in the state, and ideally experienced in the county, where the case will be filed. For more questions to ask, see questions for your first consultation.

Related guides

This guide is general information, not legal advice, and laws differ from state to state. For advice about your situation, talk to a lawyer licensed in your state. Last reviewed November 4, 2026.